Melissa Atkins Wardy has a saying - "once you see it, you can't unsee it". The 'it' she is refering to is the ways in which girls and boys are conditioned in our society. But for me, this saying has come to encompass so much more. My eyes were opened, first to the gender limitations of our society (thanks to Danielle Miller, Media Education Foundation and PPBB) but along the journey to motherhood I started to become aware of the impact of mainstream cultural norms and conditioning on adults too. particulary in relation to birth, breastfeeding and parenting practices.
I have always been the kind of person who seeks out knowledge, who actively works to better myself. I am not ashamed to admit that my bookshelf and library borrowing history are both full of 'self-help' books. Along with this, I also have major attachment issues - resulting in bouts of depression and onging Genralised Anxiety Disorder. Parenthood was the impetus for my research - a desperate need to protect my child from my own amblivent attachment, as well as the massive amounts of stress that comes with your husband leaving, and from developing Anxiety or any other mental illness. (There's quite a few in my family tree!)
What I discovered has changed how I veiw the entire world, and I keep finding I need an outlet for my views since they are increasingly less mainstream.
So this is now my outlet.
Welcome.
I have always been the kind of person who seeks out knowledge, who actively works to better myself. I am not ashamed to admit that my bookshelf and library borrowing history are both full of 'self-help' books. Along with this, I also have major attachment issues - resulting in bouts of depression and onging Genralised Anxiety Disorder. Parenthood was the impetus for my research - a desperate need to protect my child from my own amblivent attachment, as well as the massive amounts of stress that comes with your husband leaving, and from developing Anxiety or any other mental illness. (There's quite a few in my family tree!)
What I discovered has changed how I veiw the entire world, and I keep finding I need an outlet for my views since they are increasingly less mainstream.
So this is now my outlet.
Welcome.
commenting policy
Please read the following policy before commenting
There are no off limits topics on this blog, which means that things can easily escalate if care is not taken before posting a comment.
It is not practical for me to moderate every comment both here and on social media, so please help me out by moderating yourself!
There are no off limits topics on this blog, which means that things can easily escalate if care is not taken before posting a comment.
It is not practical for me to moderate every comment both here and on social media, so please help me out by moderating yourself!
- No inciting comments: (eg) formula is poison, home births are dangerous, not vaccinating is reckless, parents should have their children taken away for x
- Adult debate and questioning is fine, name calling, slander, accusations, bringing your friend in to back you up, bullying and otherwise acting like high schoolers is NOT.
example
Poster 1: I did my research and I made an informed choice, I still think circumcision was the best choice for my child.
Poster 2: would you mind sharing why? What is it that convinced/es you that this was the right choice?
Poster 3: I have a lot of trouble understanding that, I don't believe that anyone has the right to decide what is the best thing for someone else's body. I think it is a choice that should only be made by an adult, for themselves.
Poster 2: would you mind sharing why? What is it that convinced/es you that this was the right choice?
Poster 3: I have a lot of trouble understanding that, I don't believe that anyone has the right to decide what is the best thing for someone else's body. I think it is a choice that should only be made by an adult, for themselves.
not
Poster 2: Well you are an idiot then, how on earth can you possibly believe it is the right choice if you are informed about it? I feel sorry for your children since clearly you make crap decisions
Poster 3: Who gave you the right to mutilate your child's body without their consent?
Poster 3: Who gave you the right to mutilate your child's body without their consent?
- Read the article!!!!!!!! Then read it again, and probably a third time.
- Same goes for any post you wish to reply to -That way you triple your opportunity to display adequate reading comprehension skills, and don't make yourself look like an idiot
- Think empathy first. Before you hit send, stop, and ask yourself is this going to make things better, or worse?
- Ask yourself - Is this the best way to get your point across?
- If you disagree with someone, then disagree with their argument. Not like poster 1 below.
Example
Poster 1: It's just a joke on a van, you all need to lighten up.
Poster 2: You may see it as a joke, but there are thousands of victims of domestic violence who don't think there is anything funny about violence against women. These vans drive around the country with messages that normalise violence against women - being used purposely to gain attention and therefore advertise the company. It is not appropriate or funny.
Poster 1: Sounds like you need to get laid
Poster 2: You may see it as a joke, but there are thousands of victims of domestic violence who don't think there is anything funny about violence against women. These vans drive around the country with messages that normalise violence against women - being used purposely to gain attention and therefore advertise the company. It is not appropriate or funny.
Poster 1: Sounds like you need to get laid